INT – THE VINYL PRICK – AFTERNOON

Elias is filing records at The Vinyl Prick. A young girl named SIMONE enters through the door to The Vinyl Prick. She wears a red buttoned dress shirt with a thin tank top black shirt beneath. She wears low maroon shorts. Her purse is in one hand and records under her right arm. Elias looks up quietly and glances at her over an aisle of records. He shifts his eyes down back to filing records. Music can heard in the background from speakers in corners of the store. Simone starts walking slowly through two aisles of records.

(From the Sound Studio of The Vinyl Prick in the back)

KEVIN:
God this sounds purely orgasmic!

Elias walks slowly over to Simone.

ELIAS:
Oh I am sorry about that.

SIMONE:
He truly knows how to embarrass himself!

ELIAS:
They can make things very uncomfortable.

SIMONE:
Wait!…they?!

ELIAS:
I didn’t actually learn until I got the job that they could be this annoying.

He whispers to her.

ELIAS: (CONT’D)
I don’t buy into their shit. It sucks. Could I help you by any chance?

SIMONE:
I brought in a few records I was hoping I could sell to you guys.

ELIAS:
I suppose it depends which ones they are.

SIMONE:
Well I have some classic Beatles records, but I have gotten into a retro rock phase.

ELIAS:
Oh yeah? What are you interested in mainly?

SIMONE:
The Doors right now. They are super sick! My only wish is that I could have been around while they were really huge in the music spotlight of the scene.

ELIAS:
Are you serious? That is mine ultimately as well! I love Jim Morrison.

SIMONE:
Don’t tell me you have a shrine too?!

ELIAS:
Yeah I certainly do fo sho.

SIMONE:
Uhhhh…right…I was just kidding though.

ELIAS:
Oh yeah, pfffft…I knew that…hehe my name is Elias.

SIMONE:
Mine is Simone.

ELIAS:
Nice to meet you. What Doors records do you have?

SIMONE
I have most of their popular records. I was hoping you would have some of their older and much more rare records.

ELIAS:
Uhhh…actually unfortunately I am not exactly sure. I haven’t seen any here. Trust me I am disappointed as you probably are.

SIMONE:
I didn’t say that.

ELIAS:
However, I have personally have the original The Doors records.

SIMONE:
I could come over and listen to them if you like. Actually I usually sing and play guitar at The Clit Cluster. Would you like to come along and watch tonight?

ELIAS:
Uhhhh…sure yeah. I get off work in five minutes.

SIMONE:
(in an innocent tone) Is it alright if I just wait for you while you get ready to leave?

ELIAS:
Yeah that’s fine.

Elias walks up around the side of the counter in the back room of The Vinyl Prick. He takes a deep breath and is overwhelmed by the fact that Simone asked him out not to mention her immense beauty. Music may be heard from the back room.

KEVIN: (O.S)
(From Simone’s P.O.V) All I think is that Pee going into Vagi is a major factor.

JASON: (O.S)
What would the world be without sexual tyrants? Pussies would be as dry as the skin that peels off my balls.

KEVIN:
Don’t tell me I am the one who needs to get the god damn skin box. The last time you blew all the disgusting withered shit in my face.

Kevin walks out of the back room to the front counter. He looks up toward Simone waiting looking at various records along the aisles. Jason follows Kevin to the front counter to speak to him. Music resonates from behind them.

KEVIN:
( To Simone) Hey why are you here?!

SIMONE:
I am just here waiting for Elias thanks.

KEVIN:
Pffft…alright (under his breath) bitch!

JASON:
What the fuck! You can’t deny that you have used it to stash slips of acid inside there for yourself. Well you’ve probably eaten bits of skin mistaking it for crystal tea.

KEVIN:
Fuck yeah! Wish I hadn’t! If anything an acid trip must make everything feel so fucking better!

JASON:
Have you ever tried that before dude?

KEVIN:
I can only see that working best if you fucked the Beatles.

JASON:
I dunno dude, that just sounded uber gay….like really super gay.

KEVIN:
I am not fucking insecure about sexuality you bastard. Take a look at yourself! Hahaha! Are you a God damn homophobe?

JASON:
No fucking way! Everyone knows we’re all a little gay inside. It’s just science.

KEVIN:
Doesn’t stop us from singing the melody to many delicious cunts just aching to get fucking boned.

Elias returns from the back room with his coat.

ELIAS:
(under his breath) I’m lonely because I am a fucking pussy.

ELIAS: (CONT’D)
Take care guys. I’m out.

KEVIN:
(To Elias) Do you think that beat you heard in there would make you pitch a tent? Alrighty dude, see you Sunday. Fuck away!

Elias walks over to Simone between one of the aisles of dusty records. Kevin and Jason walk back into their small music studio in the back of The Vinyl Prick.

ELIAS:
God they embarrass me. Leave the Beatles records here on the counter.

He takes them from under her arm and a shiver runs down the back of his spine slightly as he takes them from her. Elias and Simone both head toward the door and it closes behind them as they exit.

INT – THE CLIT CLUSTER – EVENING

Dim lights illuminate the pub and contrast the bright spotlight on the stage centered on Simone playing a tune on her guitar. The florescent beer lights glitter across the counter in the back at the bar. The florescent beer lights reflect from the counter onto the beer bottles behind the counter. Elias sits at a small table and watches Simone singing at the front in the pub on a small stage. He sips a cup of coffee. Simone finishes playing her song on the guitar in front of the small audience surrounding her on the stage. The audience cheers and Elias claps. Simone takes her guitar and swings it over her shoulder. Simone’s purse is wrapped around the side of a chair. She steps off the stage down towards Elias sitting at his table. She sits down across from him.

SIMONE:
Now tell me the truth, did I completely humiliate myself?

ELIAS:
Oh yeah, you could not have sounded any better.

Elias head leans down into his coffee cup. He is hypnotized by the short, slow ripples in the cup.

SIMONE:
You seem dazed. Are you doing well?

He looks up from his cup at Simone’s face.

ELIAS:
Sorry yeah. It can be difficult to write a song that can get through to your listeners. Sometimes people just forget how life is a playground of love along the way. I’ll have more time when I finally graduate.

SIMONE:
I try to hit pressure points. When do you finish school?

ELIAS:
I graduate in a little while. We have prom before the graduation ceremony.

SIMONE:
Have you found someone to go to the prom with?

ELIAS:
Uhhhh…no. I don’t even know if I will go.

SIMONE:
Because I was wondering whether I could come along as your date.

Elias hesitates and pauses for a moment.

SIMONE (CONT’D):
I mean if you are going with a bunch of friends I completely understand…No…No…I don’t want to intrude or anything.

Elias looks up from his coffee cup and begins to smile. He glances into Simone’s eyes.

ELIAS:
Oh yeah! That’ll be great!

SIMONE:
I’ll definitely have to get a beautiful dress.

ELIAS:
Oh yes absolutely! What time is it?

SIMONE:
Time to leave.

Elias digs in his pockets momentarily and places some change down on the table. Simone has her guitar wrapped around her shoulder. Simone drinks the last of her awter bottle and Elias exit The Clit Cluster.

INT – ELIAS’ BASEMENT – NIGHT

Elias walks through into his room. And slouches down in his comfortable, cushioned chair next to his bed and amplifier. Simone follows him inside. Simone takes a glance at all hiss records on his shelf next to his television.

ELIAS:
My parents have gone out to their cottage for the weekend until Sunday.

Elias throws his coat down on his bed.

SIMONE:
Whoa this is crazy!

ELIAS:
Its called being a seventeen year old pack rat. I fill my lousy life with shit that has a musical pulse.

Elias stands up from the cushioned chair and pops a record onto the turntable. He sits back down in the chair next to his amp and his bed.

SIMONE:
I am no different. What people own end up owning us. You have to live life to its fullest.

ELIAS:
The shit people own have only one purpose. To satisfy our pithy little lives with happiness. The truth is that my music is the one thing that keeps me calm like a bomb.

Simone continues to browse along the shelf of records.

SIMONE:
It really mellows me out. I have been playing at The Clit Cluster for a while now.

ELIAS:
I usually experiment with my guitar myself.

SIMONE:
Have you written anything lately?

ELIAS:
No not really.

SIMONE:
That is not exactly the answer a girl wants to hear you know.

ELIAS:
And what does a girl expect to hear. Its absurd that I can only express sad emotions.

SIMONE:
Its hard to see that from you. Mind you that you have listened to me. You shouldn’t be shy at all even if you are lying.

ELIAS:
No I’m not! I believe that the tones of music played are what brings out the best in the hearts of the most passionate…Like me. It’s your life’s theme.

SIMONE:
You’re left with a flood of love.

Simone turns around from flicking through the records on the shelf. She looks back into Elias’ eyes. She moves back from the shelf and allows herself to fall gently down onto his bed. He moves over from the chair next to her on his bed.

ELIAS:
Sorry but truthfully my shyness is a serious tick. And I feel embarrassed enough. Oh God you must find me really weird!

SIMONE:
I highly doubt that is a lie. I try not to.
You are far from it. At least you are not obsessed with sports. I’d rather travel across the world as a journalist following musicians and getting caught up with their adventures and antics along the way. Music is an unbreakable love that binds all of us. Its something anyone can relate to in one sense or another.

ELIAS:
Would you like a drink?

SIMONE:
Why? Were you hoping to get me drunk and date rape me to death?

ELIAS:
Ummmm…yeah that’s exactly what I was intending.

SIMONE:
Fuck! Lighten up! You don’t need to get me wasted. I am not that type of girl. HAHAHAHA!

ELIAS:
Alright. I want my voice to be heard as I grow older. I have a song I have learned that I have composed except I have not written all the lyrics to it. Would you like to hear it?

SIMONE:
If you don’t mind…hehe.

ELIAS:
Hmmmmm…ok.

Turns on guitar amp and starts playing softly. Simone stares and listens to him.

ELIAS: (CONT’D)
Its not until you hear the mesmerizing sound of the strings that you truly realize how much great beauty actually surrounds you.

SIMONE:
Even now with you lovely.

Elias stops playing the guitar. He puts the guitar down by the side of his bed. They embrace slowly and kiss. They both lean back on his bed.

SIMONE:
Do you have protection?

ELIAS:
Yeah I think so.

Simone unzips Elias’ hooded sweat shirt and takes off his shirt. She unbuttons her loose red dress shirt and takes off her thin black tank top underneath revealing nothing but her bra. Elias tears her bra off vigorously and lie down on his bed together. Various frames of Elias and Simone kissing passionately leaning back on his bed.

CUT TO

Elias and Simone lying in Elias’ bed next to each other. Simone is smoking a cigarette. She puts it out in a small saucer on Elias’ low dresser drawer. Simone leans down under Elias’ shoulders and kisses his cheek. Simone dozes on his chest, a little below his shoulders. She closes her eyes and Elias puts his arms around her body. He sighs quietly.

Khemical Kiss Productions 2009©

INT – MIRABEL’S BEDROOM – EVENING

FADE IN

(She speaks to Elias on the phone)

MIRABEL:
You wouldn’t believe where I went today.

ELIAS:
I dunno, Where?

MIRABEL:
The underground opium den in Chinatown.

ELIAS:
I didn’t even know there was one here.

MIRABEL:
Yeah neither did I.

ELIAS:
I would have definitely come along.

MIRABEL:
Yeah I bet work was really ball busting

(in a sarcastic tone of voice)

MIRABEL: (CONT’D)
Your boss does sound like a mad jack off though. You have to admit.

ELIAS:
Yeah…true.

MIRABEL:
I went with William. He gets his reefer from his drug dealer there.

ELIAS:
Oh my God! Are you serious?

MIRABEL:
Yeah it was absolutely incredible! It was around this really shady part of chinatown.

ELIAS:
I didn’t know he smoked on his own.

MIRABEL:
Yeah he has a very dedicated relationship with Mary Jane it seems.

ELIAS:
Hahahahaha!

MIRABEL:
I bumped into William from One Stop Video Shop at a movie store.

ELIAS:
What the fuck! Dickhead! He has all the videos he wants at his damn fingertips.

INT –LAST CHANCE VIDEO– LATE AFTERNOON

(Mirabel and William walk through the aisles of videos in the movie store just browsing through them)

MIRABEL:
Why in the hell are you getting a movie here?

WILLIAM:
Because I want to see a good movie!

MIRABEL:
But you work in a fucking video store.

WILLIAM:
Those movies are pure shit though.

MIRBAEL:
And these films here aren’t?

MIRABEL: (CONT’D) V.O
( TO ELIAS) He told me the movies at One Stop Video Shop are just full of blank cases.

INT – LAST CHANCE VIDEO – LATE AFTERNOON

WILLIAM:
They have a better selection here. The titles of mine are written on the front with a sharpie marker.

Elias sits on his sofa talking into the telephone.

ELIAS:
Shit! That is damn lazy. It is fucking amateurish.

INT – LAST CHOICE VIDEO – LATE AFTERNOON

WILLIAM:
Its not that I am so much of a slacker than I really don’t care.

MIRABEL:
That doesn’t change anything. You sit on your ass all day and do absolutely nothing.

WILLIAM:
Speak for yourself.

MIRABEL:
Shove it up your ass! My mother is pestering me already.

WILLIAM:
I can’t see why that would be annoying.
William walks past Mirabel ahead and lays his hands down and bends on his knees.

MIRABEL:
WIDE SHOT. Mirabel stands staring at William on his knees in front of the XXX Horror section.

CUT TO Mirabel and William walking out of Last Chance Video.

INT – CITY STREET SIDEWALK – LATE AFTERNOON

WILLIAM:
I need to stop off to pick up a pound and toke up.

MIRABEL:
Are you that bloody desperate!

INT – ELIAS’ BEDROOM – EVENING

ELIAS:
I always wondered why he acted so spaced out.

EXT – OPIUM DEN – LATE AFTERNOON

William unlocks the door.

MIRABEL:
This better not take long.

WILLIAM:
Fine I’ll just go in by myself.

MIRABEL:
I’m not very comforta…

WILLIAM:
You are just taking life way too seriously.

MIRABEL:
(Sighs) ….Fuck!

She follows William into the opium den. They both pass across various small beds with people lying silently. Opium pipes sit next to the small bed as people mediate deeply. Numerous men smoke their opium pipes as they walk through the dark opium den. Smoke billows up briskly and dances in the air. They walk towards a door at the back of the opium den. William knocks on the door.

ADRIAN:
Who is it?

WILLIAM:
Hey dude, I’m here to pick up the Buddha aces.

ADRIAN:
Alright man Come on through.

Adrian unlocks the door and opens it to his room in the opium den.

MIRABEL: V.O
For an opium den in Chinatown none of them there seemed Asian.

William, Mirabel, and Adrian pass through a curtain in the back when they enter through the door. They enter into a small room with a dirty couch, a lazy boy chair, a coffee table full of odd colourful bongs, joints and cups full of coffee sitting in front of the couch. Also, a dresser, a fireplace and a small television.

WILLIAM:
Adrian, this is my friend, Mirabel.

ADRIAN:
Hey man, nice to meet you. I hope he has got your ass.

MIRABEL:
Ok…sure.

ADRIAN:
Take a break and have a seat guys. I’ll get you the prime shit for ya.

WILLIAM:
Yes, equip me sir with the best.

Mirabel and William sit down on the couch.

ADRIAN:
Do you smoke?

MIRABEL:
Uhhh..not really. A little I guess.

Adrian walks over to the dresser drawer and opens it. He takes out a bag of opium and weed. On the couch William looks down at the absurd bong sitting on the table before him.

WILLIAM:
Holy shit dude…what the hell is that?

Adrian turns his head towards William.

ADRAIN:
Oh dude, that is exceptionally rad! I call it Alice the Wonderbong.

WILLIAM:
How do you use it?

ADRIAN:
You light it at the top and smoke this shit through the tubes. I have used this thing since I was a bloody baby incestian.

WILLIAM:
What in the fuck? Is that even a word?

ADRIAN:
I don’t know. What do you expect from a bastard child.

MIRABEL:
I thought you and your parents?…

WILLIAM:
You sound like a horny martian molester.

ADRIAN:
I feel like a Jawa except I am not one of those pussy three foot midgets from The Wizard of Oz and Star Wars…on that note…

Adrian places the opium down on the table. He takes a seat in the lazy boy chair facing the couch to his left. Adrian picks up and puts on a gas mask attached to a bong. He puffs through it. Inhales the opium smoke.

ADRIAN:
(In a deep voice) Luke…I am your father.

He exhales the smoke.

WILLIAM:
No! That’s impossible!

Adrian passes the mask to William.

MIRABEL:
You guys are fucking retarded.

WILLIAM:
I find your lack of faith disturbing.

ADRIAN:
Shut up you powerpuff girl. Just drink it in. hahahaha!

William takes the mask off.

WILLIAM:
Holy shit! That smell is amazing! I just want to shred this up and bathe in a Jacuzzi of this.

ADRIAN:
It’s the fucking substance of Flanders Fields.

WILLIAM:
Its World War two’s baby and gift to the world thanks to all the men who died to produce poppies.

ADRIAN:
WOW yeah! I don’t think we would have opium if it wasn’t for those men.

WILLIAM:
True that. (he nods)

ADRIAN:
Damn I think we should make a bloody bikini made entirely out of opium. That’s awesome!

WILLIAM:
Makes you wonder what pussy takes like mixed with opium.

A bubble forms above William’s head with Mirabel dressed in a bikini made out of complete opium.

MIRABEL:
Neither of you are finding your way into my panties you assholes!

The bubble pops above William’s head.

ADRIAN:
It figures anyways…hey dude help me out with Alice the Wonderbong

WILLIAM:
Yeah sure, fuckin ehhh!

William and Adrian put the bong tubes in their mouth.

MIRABEL:
What does that mean?

ADRIAN:
You haven’t shown the slightest interest in the taste of William’s cock at all. I doubt even in anyone.

MIRABEL:
FUCK YOUR BONG! Just because I don’t constantly gargle balls doesn’t mean I have not gotten laid I rather sewn my vagina up than fuck William. Have fun jerking each other off you god damn brain blitzzers.

Mirabel stands up from the couch. She picks up the stash of opium and weed. William stops inhaling and starts to cough.

WILLIAM:
Waaaa….it!

She shuts the door to Adrian’s room behind her.

CUT TO ELIAS on his phone in his bedroom.

INT – ELIAS’ BEDROOM – EVENING

ELIAS:
I can’t believe how easy he makes it to look like a prick.

INT – MIRABEL’S BEDROOM – EVENING

MIRABEL:
Her eyes twitch. CLOSE UP. Her eyes are red and she picks up a roach from the side of her bed lying against a glass ashtray.

MIRABEL:
Yeah he is a huge extroverted loser.

ELIAS:
And I don’t bloody try and look at me! Did you keep the opium?

MIRABEL:
No, I threw it away.

She takes a toke of the opium and puts it back down on the ashtray.

EXT – CITY STREET SIDEWALK – LATE AFTERNOON

Mirabel and Elias walk down the sidewalk past the graveyard. Mirabel turns her head and looks up the hill. She cannot see the Grave Digger at the top of the hill in the graveyard.

MIRABEL:
He doesn’t seem to be here.

ELIAS:
You’re beginning to have some sick and twisted obsession with this guy. I hope it doesn’t become sexual.

MIRABEL:
Shove it up your ass you bloody douch bag!

ELIAS:
Hahahaha! Don’t get all-melodramatic over it, calm down.

MIRABEL:
(sarcastically) Oh yeah and I am sure you wouldn’t if Jim Morrison’s grave was vandalized and pissed on by a bunch of bohemian punks.

ELIAS:
This coming from the girl who has a huge Tolkien Shrine?

MIRABEL:
How would you even know? For God sake it is all too clear you celebrate Morrison’s birthday.

ELIAS:
That is called respect.

MIRABEL:
Or would it be referred to as some highly obsessive neurosis that you can’t keep your mind off of? Hahahaha!

ELIAS:
I am not the only one on earth who idolizes him you know.

MIRABEL:
Would you fuck Jim Morrison if he was alive today?

ELIAS:
What? Oh God no! I’m not gay.

MIRABEL
You sure about that?

ELIAS:
(Rolls his eyes)

They both pass an individual as they walk down the sidewalk who is fixing drain pipes at the side in an alleyway next to a flower shop.

MIRABEL:
There he is by the side of the shop.

ELIAS:
Never changes.

MIRABEL:
Uhhh…yeah.

(She gives him a sarcastic expression and rolls her eyes)

ELIAS:
He never stops to give himself a break.

MIRABEL:
I cant imagine how much disgusting filtered water could be drained out of that place for Christ sake anyways!

ELIAS:
Yeah, do they even bother with him anymore? He has been trying to fix those pipes since….forever!

MIRABEL:
Watch them bust out in his face! Hahaha! That would be outrageous!

ELIAS:
Those pipes aren’t even linked to the sewer.

MIRABEL:
Half the time he just drinks.

ELIAS:
It seems like something you would do if you got a job!

MIRABEL:
Work Sucks!

ELIAS:
So I’ve heard from you on numerous occasions!

CUT TO FRITTZERS COFFEE SHOP. WIDE EXTERIOR SHOT.

INT – FRITZZERS COFEE SHOP – EARLY EVENING

MEDIUM SHOT. Mirabel and Elias sitting in a booth. They
sip their coffee Elias stirs his coffee slowly. He looks down at it.

ELIAS:
I don’t understand why caffeine is that bad for you.

MIRABEL:
Because obviously it can become a major addiction.

ELIAS:
Not for me though.

MIRABEL:
My mom consistently warns me how it may lead to vile irritability to the brain and how it poses a risk to poor concentration. Its gets so bloody redundant its not even funny.

ELIAS:
I doubt I will grow to have ugly brown teeth.

MIRABEL:
Its not like it will rot our teeth to death.

ELIAS:
People who complain about it are fucking annoying.

MIRABEL:
Especially since they feel so high and confident about it. It is seriously mind numbing.

ELIAS:
Well this is the shit that gets me up in the morning for work.

He lifts his glass and drinks from it.

ELIAS: (CONT’D)
It’s a bit of an obsession.

MIRABEL:
Pfffft…and you honestly think that caffeine won’t eat away at your teeth? The logical alternative is an alarm clock.

ELIAS:
I don’t need one. I have a mental alert in my brain or something.

A newspaper lies on the front counter. Mirabel stretches and gets up and reaches for it. She opens the newspaper and begins to look through it. Tabloids that come across her eye are as follows:

• BARBER BLEEDS RED AND WHITE STRIPPED BLOOD
• MICROSCOPIC SPACE ALIENS INFESTING CARPETS
• JACK THE RIPPER WAS A WOMAN
• TAXES IMPOSED ON OPIUM MIXED WITH SHOTS OF MORPHINE

MIRABEL:
That’s fucked. I mean who seriously reads this shit? Listen to this awful tabloid. The headline is “Taxes imposed on opium mixed with shots of morphine. Heightens drug hallucinations”. That is completely absurd.

ELIAS:
Yeah that doesn’t make sense at all.

MIRABEL:
I know! That’s bonkers! Opium is usually used for medicinal purposes. But it can result in something much worse than expected.

ELIAS:
I’m pretty sure it was legal in the 1920s. Mainly in most Asian countries. You just can’t take it out of the country.

MIRABEL:
Fucking drug addicts I hear use it to stimulate the chemical structure of the neurons in their brain. It heightens our senses of dysphoria and screws with the endorphins our brains produces.

ELIAS:
Yeah what we call “ the feel good chemicals”. Its hard to believe it actually floods our nerve cells.

MIRABEL:
Although it does reduce any stress or anxiety allowing your problems to melt away through the moment. That’s exactly what you should do with a job like yours.

ELIAS:
Mine isn’t very demanding.

MIRABEL:
That won’t stop you from feeling an irresistible state of euphoria.

ELIAS:
Oh come on…I mean where would we?…why?

MIRABEL:
Why not? Haha. Chinatown would be a start. That is my wish. What could be better than leaving all your worries in the world behind? Fuck the after effects. I seriously want to try this stuff.

ELIAS:
An Opium den does seem not any different than a damn retirement home. Elderly people go there and just end up dying.

MIRABEL:
Yeah it must be really depressing yet serene.

ELIAS:
My utmost greatest fear is dying alone all by myself.

MIRABEL:
That’s a scary thought and would suck. Wait let me guess. Will Jim Morrisson be singing your final farewell while you lie on your deathbed?

ELIAS:
Jeez I’m not that fanatically compulsive.

MIRABEL:
Yeah not as much as these assholes who have nothing better in their life but write awful articles. Fuck this place! Let’s bounce!

Mirabel reaches in her purse and Elias takes his wallet out of his pocket and they both put a bit of change on the table. They both walk out the door and it swings behind them as they leave.

EXT – CITY STREET SIDEWALK – EARLY EVENING

Mirabel and Elias walk down the sidewalk and leave Fritzzers Coffee shop behind them.

ELIAS:
Where in the hell are we going?

MIRABEL:
Hey do you know what happens when a black knight meets a white knight on a chessboard?

ELIAS:
What are you talking about?

MIRABEL:
Do you?

ELIAS:
No what?

MIRABEL:
A Knightmare.

ELIAS:
Oh my God! That is so incredibly lame.

They walk down the sidewalk and pass the park. They take a glimpse at an elderly gentleman sitting at a chess table in the park square. He wears a thin overcoat, corduroys and sneakers. He has a thick beard. They quietly linger around the park square.

MIRABEL:
Isn’t it? It’s a joy that its so bad and corny. Oh there he is just like every other day. He’s always sitting there.

ELIAS:
Who?

MIRABEL:
I call him GanGan.

ELIAS:
Oh God! why is that?

MIRABEL:
Because his long big beard reminds me of Gandalf from Lord of the Rings.

ELIAS:
Christ!…obviously.

MIRABEL:
He always sits in the park playing chess against himself.

ELIAS:
That’s God damn weird.

MIRABEL:
The thing is his game never ends. Its like he lives in his own tiny universe in his head.

ELIAS:
Kinda like..you?

MIRABEL:
Shut up!

Short sequence of Gan Gan playing chess against himself in the park square.

EXT – ONE STOP VIDEO SHOP – EARLY EVENING

ESTABLISHING SHOT. Mirabel and Elias walk down the sidewalk and near the One Stop Video Shop. Elias looks up at the sign to the store.

ELIAS:
Oh God no!

MIRABEL:
This is only going to take a minute.

ELIAS:
I hate this pencil dick!

MEDIUM SHOT. They walk inside through the door to the video store. They walk up to the counter.

WILLIAM:
Well look which cats dragged each other through the door. Hello ladies!

MIRABEL:
That is sure to get you a load of juicy fur burgers you fucking perv!

Elias ignores both Mirabel and William and wanders off looking at a rack of video cassesetes.

WILLIAM:
Still haven’t seduced Elias by the magic of your unbelievable fanciful enchanted charms and fairness? You have to admit though he can be a leech. Isn’t it a little annoying? I mean friends don’t last forever.

MIRABEL:
You can be such a dork.

WILLIAM:
Fucking Ghoul!

MIRABEL:
Ghoul? Its girl you fucking moron, a form of existence I doubt you will ever score with!

WILLIAM:
Haven’t you Elias?

Elias ignores him.

WILLIAM: (CONT’D)
You seem to be trailing behind.

MIRABEL:
Ok! Cut to the crap asshole!

WILLIAM:
Did I hit Mirabel’s soft spot?

MIRABEL:
No but I know where yours is that will make you useless to a woman on the face of this planet. Do you have it for me?

WILLIAM:
Yes princess.

He turns away toward a shelf of videos behind him.

WILLIAM: (CONT’D)
If I didn’t see you hanging out with Elias I would be convinced you were a lesbian. I actually have a list of stuff that you might be…

She grabs it from his hands and tears it in half. She lets the pieces of paper fall onto the counter. She takes the video from his hands.

MIRABEL:
See you later dick!

She gives him the middle finger

WILLIAM:
What about?

MIRABEL:
I’ll give you the money some other time.

Mirabel and Elias turn to the door of the video store and walk out. They start walking down the sidewalk.

EXT – CITY STREET SIDEWALK – LATE EVENING

ELIAS:
What did he give you?

MIRABEL:
An old Russian film classic…apparently.

CUT TO

EXT – CITY PARK – NIGHT

( Mirabel and Elias lounge over the chessboard in deserted park square. They are both exhausted)

MIRABEL:
I wonder where Gan Gan went….hmmm…He’s gone.

ELIAS:
I’m not sure. I guess his game ended.

MIRABEL:
I didn’t expect it would have. Checkmate…

ELIAS:
I’m spent. Let’s go home.

FADE OUT

Khemical Kiss Productions 2009©

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